Good completion

30 Jul

” A good completion takes a long time; a bad completion cannot be changed later.”

― Zhuangzi, The complete works of Chuang Tzu

I realized off late have been studying too many psychologists and their evidence based strategies and prescriptions for growth . Gabriele Oettingen, Heidi Grant Halvorson, Brene Brown and others. My notebook is filled with assessments. Then there are B school professors and their articles. At heart a researcher and like to learn and verify with  evidence for everything from my little experience of life.  The bottom line is this ” Every one is right. Every one is always right from their perspective.”  It doesn’t matter your focus group or sample size.  Life is vast, heterogeneous and nuanced. Every one has a different experience of life. Every one is right. Till they realize may be .. we should pursue another truth..

I have a deep urge to study. I have a strong desire to pursue academics along with my day job. Is it a pipe dream? Am I too much of a rebel to conform to rule based learning? psychology and economics interest me. Public health interests me. Life sciences interest me.  Since never focused on rule based learning and got involved in a orgy of masters, philosophy, sciences and music when young. Can I start from scratch? Do I have the patience for pursuing it for ten years ? How old I will be after ten years?  Never mind.

A great lesson of my life has been ” We must complete whatever we pursue. There must be a completion. A good completion.”

Life may have different plans for us. That is not in our control. We must control the controllables. We must try to take everything to its logical end.  I have too many in-completions. Am much more aware now  than was at seventeen or twenty five..

I realized spend time in three places – office, hospital and home.

Can I study?

Or am just good learner?

Can I conform to a syllabus?

Or am good in the self learning mode of masters ?

Do I have time?

I must decide soon one way or the other..

So I went for a walk in university campus after a long time and for some reason they have closed the gates from my side of town. How ridiculous is that…

Some pictures from today morning..

006

One more..

007

I ask the security guard to take pictures..

I look for my friends. I see none. I am not regular. I look for my professor friend, every time see him, first check if his left trousers is of same size as right trousers, never mind my friend is a  genius and sometimes carries a umbrella bigger than himself. Both of us had once gone for a walk and  got lost behind his own home and ended up seeing a peacock… Imagine that. My friend is a academic. I must meet him soon. I went to college with him. He teaches  mathematics in university.

What is easy for my friend is such a matter of deliberation for me, what is easy for me,  is difficult for him…such is life.

“What I’m not sure about, is if our lives have been so different from the lives of the people we save. We all complete. Maybe none of us really understand what we’ve lived through, or feel we’ve had enough time.”

― Kazuo Ishiguro, Never Let Me Go

I did meet a husband – wife, had gone to school with  boy, my senior in school and a family friend. I ask them about children. They ask about my family. We live totally different lives. The wife to my surprise generously says ” You have done all you can…  god does not give everything to every one.” I say Good bye and continue my run…

So I must decide..

I seek a good completion. I will keep posted.

Have a good day dear friends! I head to hospital with my mother.

Love, Suresh

 

 

 

 

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