13 Dec

016I miss blogging. Inspite of my umpteen attempts at apologies quickly need to find space and energy to blog. It’s important to share a voice, however minor or obscure, it’s important to have a voice. It’s like a back bone. It’s a litle reaffirmation of self. Else we get drowned in a sea of opinion and deluge of information, perhaps we need a anchor in this wide big mystery of the world. This is how am everyday at 8pm. I think by 8.30 will go under the table, by 9.30 pm reach home. I ask my brother ” What are you doing”, he say’s ” Enough of you, must go outside.” I need a shower. By 11 pm am tired. I usually blog at night. Iam scared of getting ulcers which has been a bane perhaps is caused by Sleeplessness. I think about my friend. I go to sleep. I feel guilty haven’t blogged again.

Never mind! I read somewhere we live for weekends, my weekends are for mother and brother. The hospital and guidance. It drains me sometimes like am today. I resolve to two read atleast two to three books a month. That excel have not started practising , Vinod Khosla’s voice ring’s in my head all the time ” It creates an illusion of knowing..”  True, am no where in great man’s league even if have subconsciously acquired some of those eccentricities ( “He is a thakur ( feudal or landed gentry) without the clout or something..” one of my cheapskate guru cum nemesis had uttered long ago…my guru was prescient but no good..)

I am reading Eric Schmidt and Jared Cohen’s book and the other for this month is Jack Kerouac’s book. I need to squeeze time, half an hour every day and catch up on weekends. Given the commute Uber can hire me…

I spent the weekend in hospital visiting my mother’s consultant’s and realised ” How important is to see a specialist…”

I also have a great desire to be ” successful and happy at all costs..” Now that’s not unique, perhaps given that am waiting for my first happy experience since 1984…it is important. Very important. I am content and driven,now only if my friend would call that would be cool…

Till then, will try post more, regardless of ulcers, have a easy sunday dear friends!

Love, Suresh


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