Archive | December, 2015

Happy New Year!

31 Dec

Happy New Year dear friends! May this year pan out exactly as you would want to.

Here are some maxims to live by

“Be interested.” ( John W Gardner)
the readiness is all” ( Hamlet)
We must learn to join the love of work with the love of higher things“(  Chekhov’s ‘The Three Sisters’)
“ Study hard what interests you the most in the most undisciplined, irreverent and original manner possible.” ( Richard Feynman)
“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.”  ( Pablo Neruda)
Goodnight dear friends! Happy 2016! Stay happy and it’s possible 🙂
Love, Suresh
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Quote 30 Dec

“The first thing I say is go to the best school that you can get into. For college or graduate school, if you have the opportunity that fits your career plans, go to the best school you can go to and sometimes you just have to figure out how to pay for it later. I’d say that’s super important.”

Meg Whitman, CEO at Hewlett Packard Enterprise

For more: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/from-oprah-richard-branson-biggest-names-business-share-iriondo?trk=hp-feed-article-title-share

I came across this Career advice on Linkedin. I think its the best advice you can give to children if you are a parent. Getting into the best school that they can get into is important. I also feel there is no way you can predict which child will be come a entrepreneur, president, lawyer, athlete, actor or a doctor when you look at a group of school children. But if they can get into the best school they can get into. Not necessarily the best but the best they can get into. It will be a great start and they will figure and find their way.

This is the only regret that have, may be someday will study in a college course that like, have something in mind, just dont know how to pay for it. May be am old. Never mind.  Getting children into the best schools they can get into is super important. Meg Whitman is very right and has some great advise if you follow the Linkedin story.

Have a good day dear friends!

Love, Suresh

 

Video

Robert Waldinger :What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness ( TED talk)

27 Dec

This is a great talk. I came across this talk in LinkedIn shared by  Jeff Weiner. Linkedin has a terrific CEO  and has great ideas. That’s a different post.

Robert Waldinger, Director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, in this TED talk shares a most important research from a longitudinal study of 75 years of  involving 724 men that the most important things are not money or fame but ” Relationships. Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.” This is so true. More from the talk :

We’ve learned three big lessons about relationships. The first is that social connections are really good for us, and that loneliness kills. It turns out that people who are more socially connected to family, to friends, to community, are happier, they’re physically healthier, and they live longer than people who are less well connected.

And we know that you can be lonely in a crowd and you can be lonely in a marriage, so the second big lesson that we learned is that it’s not just the number of friends you have, and it’s not whether or not you’re in a committed relationship, but it’s the quality of your close relationships that matters. It turns out that living in the midst of conflict is really bad for our health. High-conflict marriages, for example, without much affection, turn out to be very bad for our health, perhaps worse than getting divorced. And living in the midst of good, warm relationships is protective.”

And the third big lesson that we learned about relationships and our health is that good relationships don’t just protect our bodies, they protect our brains. It turns out that being in a securely attached relationship to another person in your 80s is protective, that the people who are in relationships where they really feel they can count on the other person in times of need, those people’s memories stay sharper longer. And the people in relationships where they feel they really can’t count on the other one, those are the people who experience earlier memory decline. And those good relationships, they don’t have to be smooth all the time. Some of our octogenarian couples could bicker with each other day in and day out, but as long as they felt that they could really count on the other when the going got tough, those arguments didn’t take a toll on their memories. “

For more : http://www.ted.com/talks/robert_waldinger_what_makes_a_good_life_lessons_from_the_longest_study_on_happiness/transcript?language=en

Every one want’s peace, love and happiness. Relationships are our greatest source of happiness and also our misery. It’s not easy. I have often felt ” I have no problems with others, my challenges have only come from myself.” I also like to think increasingly ” If only if we dont come in our way. we can have good lives.” Iam work in progress. I also feel self pity and resentment should be removed from our system. We may or may not get all the love and affection we need . But we can always love unconditionally. That is my current conviction and practice.  I wish for every one a person who loves  and cares for them ” Just for what they are and the way they are.”

I saw a message from Indian mystic Sadhguru ” As the year ends atleast make one promise. You will not be a issue in your life. ” I think it’s a good message.

Robert Waldinger has a great message ” Focus on good quality relationships.” I hope it works for all of us. Atleast we should try and give it a shot…

Have a easy Sunday!

Love, Suresh

 

Video

Merry Xmas!

24 Dec

Every year  post this song, this is one of my favorite Queen songs..

“Thank God It’s Christmas”

Oh my love we’ve had our share of tears
Oh my friend we’ve had our hopes and fears
Oh my friends it’s been a long hard year
But now it’s Christmas
Yes it’s Christmas
Thank God it’s Christmas

The moon and stars seem awful cold and bright
Let’s hope the snow will make this Christmas right
My friend the world will share this special night
Because it’s Christmas
Yes it’s Christmas
Thank God it’s Christmas
For one night

Thank God it’s Christmas yeah
Thank God it’s Christmas
Thank God it’s Christmas
Can it be Christmas?
Let it be Christmas
Ev’ry day

Oh my love we’ve lived in troubled days
Oh my friend we have the strangest ways
All my friends on this one day of days
Thank God it’s Christmas
Yes it’s Christmas
Thank God it’s Christmas
For one day

Thank God it’s Christmas
Yes it’s Christmas
Thank God it’s Christmas
Oooh yeah
Thank God it’s Christmas
Yes yes yes yes it’s Christmas
Thank God it’s Christmas
For one day

A very merry Christmas to you all..

Merry Xmas dear friends and may you have more and more smiles in your life..
And remember Freddie Mercury! Can you sing like that, anyone 🙂
Love, Suresh

John W. Gardner : Learn all your life.

23 Dec

” One of the enemies of sound, lifelong motivation is a rather childish conception we have of the kind of concrete, describable goal toward which all of our efforts drive us. We want to believe that there is a point at which we can feel that we have arrived. We want a scoring system that tells us when we’ve piled up enough points to count ourselves successful.

So you scramble and sweat and climb to reach what you thought was the goal. And when you get there, you stand up and look around and chances are you feel a little empty. Maybe more than a little empty.

You wonder whether you climbed the wrong mountain.

But the metaphor is all wrong. Life isn’t a mountain that has a summit. Nor is it – as some suppose – a riddle that has an answer. Nor a game that has a final score.

Life is an endless unfolding and — if we wish it to be — an endless process of self-discovery, an endless and unpredictable dialogue between our own potentialities and the life situations in which we find ourselves. By  potentialities I mean not just intellectual gifts but the full range of one’s capacities for learning, sensing, wondering, understanding, loving and aspiring.

Perhaps you think that by age 35 or 45 or even 55 you will have explored those potentialities pretty fully. Don’t deceive yourself! The capacities you actually develop to the full come out as the result of an interplay between you and life’s challenges – and the challenges keep coming. And the challenges keep changing ”

―  John W. Gardner, the Haas Professor of Public Service,

Stanford’s 100th Commencement Ceremony address 1991

Source:http://gardnercenter.stanford.edu/docs/JWGCentennialCommencementSpeech.pdf

This is one of the best talks on personal renewal that  have come across. I discovered the  late Stanford professor’s talk only recently. I have always wondered if there is a blue print for one’s journey and there is none.

As the noted American public servant and professor says ” The capacities you actually develop to the full come out as the result of an interplay between you and life’s challenges – and the challenges keep coming. And the challenges keep changing.”

I have often tried to find reference points for my experiences and  found none. May be lacked a mentor. May be was too much of a rebel. May be life just dealt a different card. I made mistakes. Big mistakes.  My math teacher had once told me when was sixteen ” No man is an island..” I became a island.

Sometimes wish father had lived longer, a friend stayed longer or a early success. I have seen one success creating tremendous ripple effects. I so wish…

I also feel suffering has no meaning unless it leads to something, something greater or something changes in you. It is also relative, suffering pales in comparison. May be we should make it count.  I was feeling low while driving back home at night today only to see a boy in a wheel chair stuggling to cross a narrow chaotic street, yesterday at a traffic signal had called a poor girl, who has to put on a act every day to carry a cripple on her shoulder for some money, she asked for water, she bought a bottle, poured water from my bottle to hers. I smiled at her, she smiled back, realised we both are same…intense and ….

But am lucky in a way have met my heroes. My school friends and teachers. Where will I end up, have no idea, hopefully somewhere better..

Goodnight dear friends. Please do read John W Gardner, Stanford’s 100th Commencement Ceremony address..

Life is a constant journey in learning. Yes also grit.If so life happens to you this way..

Love, Suresh

 

Video

Robert L. Joss :Top 10 Life Lessons

20 Dec

I love learning and very much wish to share Robert L. Joss, former Dean Emeritus, Stanford Graduate School of Business talk ” Top 10 Life lessons”. Given we have one life, the scope of this talk is huge and given the professor’s illustrious track record in industry and academia. This is a fascinating talk.  For a Bio of Robert L. Joss : https://www.gsb.stanford.edu/faculty-research/faculty/robert-l-joss

To borrow opening lines from the Stanford Bio:

” Robert Joss has been a long-time student and practitioner of general management and organizational leadership. His interests and work lead him to explore such issues as (a) what makes managers and leaders effective, (b) how can people be developed to be good managers and leaders, and (c) what causes people to succeed or fail in these important roles.”

It is precisely in this context ” how people can succeed or fail in important roles” that this talk is useful for those of us who work in the industry and could immensely find a direction or a compass or a gem from this talk. Not all lives are same nor all life experiences are similar but we can learn immensely from a fruitful and extremely well lived life such as the good professor.  I would highly recommend this talk of  Dean ,Robert L. Joss, GSB.

To summarise from ” Top 10 life lessons” :

  1. Life is like cricket
    9. Life is too short to deal with “bad” people
    8. Run it like you own it
    7. Don’t forget to manage side-ways
    6. Don’t take yourself too seriously
    5. Without fear — there is no courage
    4. Life is full of “character building experiences”
    3. Find the words
    2. Use CAT and GSB learning throughout your life
    1. Don’t forget to renew yourself

These are great pointers. I concur with all of them wholeheartedly. The idea is to be ” To be yourself with lot more skills.” The good professor cites the example of Sir Ernest Shackleton, the great Antarctic explorer and John W. Gardner. To quote John Gardner from a commencement address:

“You can keep your zest until the day you die. If I may offer you a simple maxim, “Be interested.” Everyone wants to be interesting, but the vitalizing thing is to be interested. Keep your curiosity, your sense of wonder. Discover new things. Care. Risk. Reach out.

Learn all your life. Learn from your failures, from your successes. I know that some of you are alittle frightened – more than a little – of what’s ahead. You know a lot – perhaps too much – about the ways in which lives get messed up. Bright illusions aren’t your problem. But someone said,
“Life is an error-making and error-correcting process.” When you hit a spell of trouble, ask yourself, “What is it trying to teach me?”
I enjoyed this talk by Dean Robert L. Joss immensely and as the good professor alludes in the talk, life is full of ” character building experiences” ( Read challenges) this talk may just help us in navigating those situations with little more  dexterity,preparation and skill..
To quote my favorite actor Nasserudin shah from a interview ” As Hamlet said ” the readiness is all“…”
Please do refer this talk for good practical tips and useful pointers for work situations.
Have a bright sunday dear friends!
Love, Suresh
Image

Hello..

13 Dec

016I miss blogging. Inspite of my umpteen attempts at apologies quickly need to find space and energy to blog. It’s important to share a voice, however minor or obscure, it’s important to have a voice. It’s like a back bone. It’s a litle reaffirmation of self. Else we get drowned in a sea of opinion and deluge of information, perhaps we need a anchor in this wide big mystery of the world. This is how am everyday at 8pm. I think by 8.30 will go under the table, by 9.30 pm reach home. I ask my brother ” What are you doing”, he say’s ” Enough of you, must go outside.” I need a shower. By 11 pm am tired. I usually blog at night. Iam scared of getting ulcers which has been a bane perhaps is caused by Sleeplessness. I think about my friend. I go to sleep. I feel guilty haven’t blogged again.

Never mind! I read somewhere we live for weekends, my weekends are for mother and brother. The hospital and guidance. It drains me sometimes like am today. I resolve to two read atleast two to three books a month. That excel have not started practising , Vinod Khosla’s voice ring’s in my head all the time ” It creates an illusion of knowing..”  True, am no where in great man’s league even if have subconsciously acquired some of those eccentricities ( “He is a thakur ( feudal or landed gentry) without the clout or something..” one of my cheapskate guru cum nemesis had uttered long ago…my guru was prescient but no good..)

I am reading Eric Schmidt and Jared Cohen’s book and the other for this month is Jack Kerouac’s book. I need to squeeze time, half an hour every day and catch up on weekends. Given the commute Uber can hire me…

I spent the weekend in hospital visiting my mother’s consultant’s and realised ” How important is to see a specialist…”

I also have a great desire to be ” successful and happy at all costs..” Now that’s not unique, perhaps given that am waiting for my first happy experience since 1984…it is important. Very important. I am content and driven,now only if my friend would call that would be cool…

Till then, will try post more, regardless of ulcers, have a easy sunday dear friends!

Love, Suresh